My Childhood in Kuching III

Mommy said the four fundamental forces will be fully functioned in hyperspace; she said I will be fully functioned if I end up in a right place too!



Nagged by Little Money’s Mommy

Mommy nagged that we merely get stuck like long neglected, starving and unloved poor caged pets in Kuching due to my Chinaman daddy’s “great” idea of family reunion, which she regretted of being too trustful, naive and obedient as a stereo-type good demure Chinese wife but resulted in “surrendering herself directly to a jail” on both her professional career and very interesting past life. Let me tell you something that you may not know: During those good old baby to toddler days, I was always entertained by many pretty girls, not like these days in my school, all those girls ran away from me, they would scream, 'Yu..ck! Grasshoppers!' when they saw me approaching them.

   Since last year, daddy’s new subcontracted project caused him absented from home 28 out of 30 days, mommy sadly told me how bad fate begins to increasingly shower upon her after she got married but especially after she moves to this strange new meow city, she said ridiculous enough her marriage could make everyone in the family happy, and also my EEs (aunties) could tell her the best thing she ever done was to beget me and my sister, mommy said even up to these days she still never could fathom “Chinawomen’s silly mentality”!

   ‘ ….. If a man can bring back sufficient cash money to his helpless jobless wife if he is always not around in town, at least she can managed the family alone easier.’ Mommy lamented she neither has enough money to spend nor physically presented husband; she said what she has is just a 4th dimensional husband. I think I know what she said; she also hinted that I have a 4th dimensional daddy too!

After we moved to Kuching since four years ago, this morning mommy finally decided we don’t belong to this city, ‘ ….. Neither this city belongs to us’, she gave a cold chuckle before continued, ‘we persevere here may be just because we all adore this city named as Kuching, (Cat in Malay) as cat is our favorite animal!’ Mommy said 4 fundamental forces will be fully functioned in hyperspace, she said I will be fully functioned if I end up in a right place!

   Since the day she stepped in here, odd enough this meow city doesn’t bring my mom any good luck, fame or money. She said if we end up in a new city without any backup, without much money in our pocket, we will be very lonely, as nobody will want to befriend with us when we are not able to give anyone any benefit. She said people will feel proud to befriend with doctors and Datuks, as those titles also initialed in many snobbish peoples’ minds as “can be helpful!”

   Mommy said during her most desperate time here in meow city, she tried to approach a youth director to propose a program to help Sarawakiens in raising standard of a certain rare skill, but she was advised by the youth director to help orphans instead. Mommy said that’s exactly like the four fundamental forces being under used on earth; otherwise these forces would be powerful like “tiger, dragon, phoenix and serpent” in hyperspace.

   Mommy said that’s the altitude of a lot of less cultivated people where they always want to push another person down to drain, but they will think they are the only best and the most eminent, she said as an innate educator she tried to foster every potential person but most of the time uncooperative parents and authorities were the hindrance for her to foster talents so she is thinking to give up completely now, she wonders if the youth director can also condescend himself to work part time as a youth director to give counseling to children, mommy said he was also embarrassing her indirectly in front of all her friends that accompanied her.

   Mom then warned me whenever a big corporation CEO, MD or someone in a high authority position that I due to meet, ' …. Don’t bring anybody, just a lawyer who is experienced and encountered enough insults, humiliations and accusation cases, he won’t look at you oddly if any proposal and discussion ends up not successful.’

   ‘Why?’ I asked

   Mommy said about 10 years ago she also encountered a similar situation, she was invited for a brain storming meeting invited by a crustacean corporation Datuk MD and his executive officers, a whole group of mommy’s friends accompanied her as they all shared the same interest on an activity of what mommy was organizing, but mommy said it turned up not a brain storming session, instead she was insulted and questioned directly of her inability in registering a pro tem committee to become a charitable organization in a short period of time.

   It was due to one of their own aggressive young crustacean geologist employee fed them wrong information, in actual facts, this crustacean geologist wanted to kick mommy out of the activity, so he could take over her job temporary just for his good friend’s benefit, as his good friend was interested in such activity’s future $$$ earning opportunity.

   Mommy mentioned that yet the crustacean corporation had never extended any monetary help other then condemning and suspicious of her abilities. She told me those oil business executives just know how to bark loudly on her yet never gave her a hand to expedite anything, as it was not the time yet they could use this pro tem organization as a tool to promote their community outreach service plan. She said after the meeting, her supporters used a different kind of pathetic and sympathized glances at her, she said that made her felt very uneasy, insulted and humiliated.

   She said she spent a lot of money from her own pocket to help sponsoring the pro tem activities and tolerated everything just because she did it for that oil city sake! Someone even told her that an ex-YB even mentioned that she was using the activities to promote her own business, she got so angry even up to these days, she told me, ‘When you did something good, DON’T ever expect a good return!’

   She said that’s real life, so far she experienced decades with this kind of inhuman treatment, she said same thing happens to her marriage life as well. She said if she thought a negative way, she would think she was born in this world to be used for a purpose by somebody and would be discarded just like any of the obsolete electronic appliances.

Mom said besides her career may be gone forever (I think due to mommy encountered many unfaithful disciples! When they wanted to use mommy, I heard with my own ears that how they flattered mommy, including how pretty she was even she was so fat! But the minute they turned their backs, they actually never trusted and cooperated with mommy, when they found another big trunk to hug, they soon forget mommy, they began to defame her and acted like mommy’s rival!) , she also felt very sad, frustrated and disappointed at my sister and I, as we both do terribly in studies at local Chinese primary school, but can you believe it …… that seemingly pleased my Chinaman dad as long as my sister and I can speak and write Mandarin even I scored the lowest mark in all four classes.

   Mommy said that in this case I should be glad that her thought was ahead of anyone including overrode daddy's stereo-type Chinaman family plan, mommy as usual with her big tummy went alone to overseas for our better future sake, thus my sister and I both were not born in Malaysia, here she said as a Chinese I never have any opportunity to become a prime minister. Can you believe what mommy said …. She said when she begot me in a country where more lazy youngsters live, then later days I may have a higher chance to become successful!

   She said “someone looks like me” thought too optimistic, if he can’t do well in a small country like Malaysia, he shouldn’t expect his children will do well in China. Mommy said one of the later day if my sister and I end in mainland China, she said China got so many geniuses, mediocre people like my sister and I will just end up as nobodies there.

   She said don’t expect luck falls on us, she said waiting for the luck falls on her and us is better then, to wait for another big bang to occur.

This early morning mommy got up early hissing and cursing a Datuk, because dad can’t afford to buy us even cheapest Air Asia tickets to go for any local trip during Hari Raya, mommy hissed angrily that she is “god damn tired of the ducking monotonous family routine life, for the god damn past ducking boring years!” I heard that big shot’s surname sounded the same with a famous Malaysian canned foods manufacturer or same sound of the Mandarin goat’s name, mommy said only certain kind of engineer has to work and monitor his workers under the hot sun by himself, then she told me never to become a third class engineer. Wasn’t that she hint me that my dad is a kind of rejected third class engineer?

   She then continued with her personal opinion, “Third class engineer working as a subcontractor, second class engineer works as a consultant, first class engineer works as an inventor.” For example, she told me how much patent bonus my youngest EE (aunty) would receive every time when she invented or created something new and this smart EE would change herself a brand new posh car in every three years.

   Mommy said she has been day-dreaming both my sister and I to earn our first degree in law before pursuing our chief interest to become an inventing scientist and plastic surgeon. Her reason is later days if I really have invented something new like for an example a most feasible powerful solar energy generator; at least I know how to protect my own rights legally instead of consulting a wrong crooked lawyer.

   BUT she said these are just dreams not something realistic, to get real we have to act mature, become self-motivated to study very hard besides having entrepreneur good spirits that always care for better living standard for everyone, she said that’s why she doesn’t like to stay in a place where most rich people think that they are the only king and all the rest of the people who work for them are slaves.

   Mommy said that’s why this could happen to an arrogant big shot when he or his wife saw a figure of half million ringgit that would be going to a subcontractor’s pocket, the figure would be soon cut off to 60%, ‘They only like to see big figures go into their own bank account not others'.’ Mommy said some rich businessmen also asked their “slaves” to evade tax for them indirectly, mommy said lousy, useless and powerless government is also like an unable fisherman as he was only keen in catching small fishes but all big fish would escape unharmed.

   Mommy told me now she also felt like an indirect slave being pinched under daddy big boss’s thumb, mommy said when daddy couldn't claim enough money from his big boss, daddy won’t be able to give a lot of money to her, then she won’t have enough money for household expenses, she said that’s the reason we don’t have kitchen cabinets since 4 years ago we moved in to Kuching. She said everyday she hopes that tomorrow will be better and richer but she and daddy’s luck actually are both betting zero since I was born.

   In this world she said "only a particular third class engineer’s big takau boss and his immediate family" entitle to have 6-stars kind of living standard, we are just slaves spared under their mercies. Mommy said when a main contractor holds the work-done money not releasing reasonably to the subcontractors, a poor subcontractor like my dad will suffer, and his immediate family will also suffer, mommy said worst is she feels she is worst than an Indonesian maid because even an Indonesian maid at least will eventually saves some cash money in bank, but mommy said due to dad’s unstable financial income incurred by his contractor, she doesn’t have any saving now, she said as long as she can pay off her monthly credit card, she should thank God’s grace on her, she told me anything can happen to a person when he works for a filthy rich lawyer, as laws can be modified by a sly lawyer.

Mommy loves to nag at us to study hard as she always said she is not optimistic of my dad’s current prospect, she said anytime we may end up sleeping on the street if something turns wrong with my daddy’s work as she is jobless now, worst very recently when she thought of reviving her career she suffers unavoided defamation by someone whom she helped greatly before.  

    

   She said she heard many Malaysian lawyers these days not really doing their legal jobs chiefly but mostly they are very successful businessmen as well, they know how to bribe contracts from the authority, and then employed subcontractors like my daddy to work on their awarded civil works, worst mommy said these lawyers don’t know anything about civil works or engineers’ job, as they sit in the air-conditioned room all the time, they thought that rainy days also could do earth works, build roads and do constructions, thus when subcontractors asked their big Datuk-contractors for money to pay their civil site workers and other expenses, usually the money released was merely 60% of work done being released.

   Mommy said now is coming to Malay new year, she questioned me, ‘How about those native workers working for your daddy, if they deserve RM1000 after sweating under hot sun, due to your daddy big boss only released 60% of work-done payment, and how about if your daddy also acted the same like his big boss, give the workers 60% payment of their work-done, i.e. RM600 for their Malay new Year?’

   Mommy said, 'These native workers will KILL your daddy BUT they won’t go killing daddy’s big boss, but actually he was the one who didn’t want to release the whole sum of work done money!' Mommy added that filthy rich people sometimes can be very very very insensitive, mommy said they don't know they are actually the worst bullies on the whole earth.

I think mommy said that we are so poor all because daddy was never able to find a good understanding big boss, we are suffering, that’s why she said for years we can’t return visiting our birth place, even RM8000 air ticket daddy can’t afford to give mommy as daddy has to use the limited money to pay his workers’ salaries in the work site, or else nobody will work for him anymore, and when a project is not progressed, there won’t have any money released by his boss who always sits in the air-conditioned room, travels in first class and who only cares if he has enough cash money to invest a new venture. Mommy said, ‘Never choose a job like daddy that depend on the sky, sunny day and someone’s mercy to earn money, that’s why we are half starving, we are staying in rainy Malaysia not the arid dessert!’

   I asked mommy what is called bribe an authority, she said this happened almost in every third world countries, ‘It means when there is a tender of multi-million ringgit released to the public, but after 7 days, contractors will receive another notice notifying that there was a cancellation of such tender or some tenders even never sees “the light” as they would directly go to someone who gave “undertable” money to the authority. ’

   'I wondered if they used a big bag-pack to carry the cash money to someone they bribed?' I said, mommy was so surprised how I know it! All because long time ago when I went to a bank with mommy, I saw a businessman walked into a special room, then I saw they were counting stacks of cash money, actually I had never seemed so much money like that in my life, later he walked out with a heavy bag-pack, I asked mommy what he was carrying, mommy said that I was stupid,

   ‘Don’t you see that’s $$$$$, the money is not belonged to the man, but I swear my head that he gives those kinds of $$$ notes to a politician, especially now is the election time!’

   Mommy said people being filthy rich but selfish, greedy and unkind usually happened to English educated British ex-colonies’ Asians with bad family background, they have no religion, with limited moral and ethical standard, she said actually they are many of this kind of mean businessmen around the globe, even in Taiwan, Korea and China there are many of this kind of filthy rich businessmen where they have many mistresses and when their wives felt neglected, usually these wives would go for plastic surgeries to make them look prettier and younger and some would end up in Buddhist monasteries to do meditations yet the minutes they walked out of the monasteries, these rich wives would act as mean, as greedy and selfish like their husbands.

   She said these filthy rich wives will be the potential clients for my sister if one later day she really can become a plastic surgeon, mommy said these rich tai tai got money, they are unhappy thus they are usually very nasty, hypocrite and mean to poorer people too, when they did charity, mommy said most of them acted like hens’ clucked when they laid eggs, and we could see that in the newspapers all the time! Mommy said, if my sister will not able turning someone to look like a famous film star Angelina Jolie as requested, she will be sued by the rich tai tai, that’s why mommy insisted that mei mei to study her first degree in law.

One day I heard our gardener complained very angrily to my mom, he said he and his son blasted off the old paint job and then painted a Datuk’s mansion for two months but ended the Datuk only gave them RM500 and even accused them of stealing, can you believe that it happened right here in Kuching city?! He said he didn’t dare to ask anymore because this Datuk has gangsters’ backup.

   Mommy told me even we are poor; at least we never bullied people like this Datuk did to our poor gardener. Obviously to me, most Datuks only carried money to “the authorities” to exchanged for contracts after contracts, they look up but never look down, like I heard someone said they hold big shot’s ball (I think that’s the right word?). But bully and rid-off poorer people and those they think who are inferior beings than them is really horrible, mommy said when I grow up if I become filthy rich too, I should act like Bill Gate donates most of his money for charity works.

   Mommy said that’s why she kept nagging me and mei mei (sister) to study hard, she said just in case one day daddy’s business goes to drain due to his hard work was not fully paid, 20 years later I still can help to straighten it if I end up as a powerful lawyer aided by another engineering degree, but she said if we don’t study hard and don’t think high and far, then we will forever “step by someone under his toes!”

我呆在古晋的童年(II)

不知怎的，我妈妈总是能挖掘出我潜意识的恐惧！



http://moneytaitai.blogspot.com/2012/07/my-childhood-in-kuching-i-somehow-my.html





唠叨:小钱钱的妈妈





自我出生以来，妈妈已梦想成为一名作家，最近她频频阅读那些厚厚的天文学书籍，然后她喜欢跟我讲她自己的科幻版本故事，有时我很困惑，她就说我愚蠢，嗯.........在这种情况下，我感到很高兴，姨姨们叫她bipolar (双极性)! 当她告诉我那些术语，如 supernova (超新星), Big bang (大爆炸) 和 time lapse(时间间隔)等等,但我学了这些新的词汇，实际上却不知道他们真正的含义。

   妈妈说，好书会让人看了半信半疑，作家写什么，就像老千让人相信他讲的话！可能妈妈讲的是对的，例如罗琳写的魔法书，大部分孩子真的相信她书中的情节。妈妈说，当读者阅读一本好书的期间, 它可以“暂时欺骗”了他们，她认为这是一本成功的书。
  
   突然有一天她告诉我世界末日可能会发生于今年底十二月21日或12月23日，她说，如果我们仍然平安的生存，她将隆重为我庆祝10岁的生日, 这是在最近几个月内, 她对我讲过最好听的话了!

 

最近，我妈妈爱告诫我世界末日可能会发生的一些悲惨事件或厄运。她告诫必须心理预备着, 如果全家人死了除了我一个人活着,  但我可能被辐射了!

   她说，如果我醒来的时候，我可能蜷缩在一个大水渠里最深的部分，她说我不应该感到惊讶，也不会有任何镜子存在了，所以如果我从毒水的反映中看到我滑稽竖立的头发，她说我应该高兴自己仍然存活着，而且仍然有一双眼睛可以看东西！

   她说，圣经中提到，活的狗比死了的人好！于是，她说，我必须勇敢地继续生活。

   她告诉我，我应该学会如何使用石头引发火苗，如何学习使用木材和木炭做饭，她还有另外一个理论:她说我可能会被吸入一个space worm (空间蠕洞) 结果落地在亚马逊内地的某处，我可能一人孤独终生或一个当地的女孩将要嫁给我！

   她说，一些土著在10岁结婚是很正常！她说，我也可能随着 “space blanket”(空间毯) 同一些旧世界文盲的人落地生根在另一个初期的宇宙中，50年后, 初期宇宙高文明水准的白人在丛林中发现我们的存在, 高文明水准的白人看到我们穿着的是大无花果叶! (母亲可真会拿我来开玩笑) 我们将在高文明水准的世界里 (...... 这些白人使用的手提电话，就好像妈妈的故事书中提到可以折叠的像中国扇子似的手提电话，但打开时，它就会变成一台电脑或电视屏幕 …………) 即刻成为著名人物。妈妈说他们的标题将是“我们找到自己称为”拉子” (福州人叫未开化的人) 的人，他们说，他们来自从遥远的一个世界。”


   我妈妈说，当我们被吸到年轻的宇宙的时候，因为我们都太年幼或者是文盲, 所以当文明的人问我源自于哪里，我却不能够给予正确的答案，因为我不知道什么是所谓的“另一个宇宙”，“太空蠕洞”并且最糟糕的是 .... 她说：我也不知道如何计算复杂的数学和理解高级科学。她说，这就是为什么我必须努力读书。

  她还提醒，我不应该笑人家称别人为 Sakai (未开文化的人) 就像我曾听到隔壁的邻居给妈妈一绰号Sakai，她说每个人都可以变成Sakai，如果真的是有空间蠕洞，妈妈说，她怀疑会有比空间蠕洞更浩大特殊的异象, 被她称为“空间毯"，它会折叠我们宇宙的一部分，包括我们的地球然后转移到另一个较年轻的宇宙，在这种情况下很多人会死亡，特别是那些有气喘病的!

   我问妈妈，为什么？她说，有哮喘的人他们总是在飞机上，由于缺乏氧气，因此他们就出现呼吸困难，他们可以很容易地紧张, 引致了致命的气喘. 因此, 如果一些未知闪电般发生，她说在这种情况我妹妹一定包死。

   她告诉我, 如果“空间毯”或“空间蠕洞”发生在一瞬间，我们会感受到失重，重力自由和浮动一样，她劝我只让它当作游玩一个迪斯尼新发明的游戏, 名为“重力自由转换带”!





她说，希望“世界末日”发生的只是不太严重......小尺度的一种, 只是没有太阳的黑暗三天，我们只需要穿冬天大衣和隐藏在毯子下三天，她说在地面至少一天后还可以释放一些对流热，她说，最要命的，如果天气3天袭击超过摄氏50度，，然后让热“慢慢烹饪”我们, 就像她如何煨煮那些 Gherkin pickles (小黄瓜泡菜)！这我可明白她说的是什么！

   然后她说，如果我们都死了，结果发现我自己会漂浮在空气中，但无法找到她和妹妹，她告诉我，那就问其他人耶稣在那里，她说如果她不能进入天堂之门，她会在门外等待，只是为了确保了我进入天堂的大门。她说，她相当肯定我所有的祖父母, 外公婆, 表兄弟姐妹，叔叔和阿姨，都在那里，他们可以好好照顾我！

   当我的头感到臃肿时, 我通常会请妈妈住嘴，她可真会挖掘出我最深潜意识的恐惧，我其实很害怕如果她真的死了！

HOW TO CURE MIGRAINE?

I often have once-a-month-migraine  since so long ago that I have forgotten!

Written by Miss Yellow

Like kids, I also love fried fish or french fries, I love something crunchy, and I become quite an expert now to fry real crunchy fried fish and ikan bilies, actually the little secret is using glutinous rice powder not the corn starch or the flour.

Fried foods? People who always have migraine will think twice before think of eating it!

If you experience migraine bad enough that every month you have to go see doctor, the doctor will give you yellow and blue mirgaine tablets. These few months however no doctor can earn my money, because when I felt a bit "bloating" over my head, I would immediately prepare my "Kacama" tea. (Leonurus heterophyllus tea)

'What Kacama? Is it "Hot" too heaty for your body and will sure make your headache gets worst!'

This is a very common warning given by Chinese old "China-women", kacama is not heaty if you don't use a kilogram of ginger to cook along with it dudes............*&^$#$**

'What? Kacama is bitter, how to make it into tea, using tea leaves?'

 Dudes.. kacama tea is not TEA leaves, chrysanthemum tea is made from chrysanthemun flowers, kacama tea is made from kacama leaves (either fresh or dried one).

 CAUTION: DON'T LET CHILDREN EAT KACAMA!!!!

 

I used my dad (prostate problem) as a guinea pig last month, initially I tried to prepare different version of kacama concoctions, eventually my dad said this version tasted the best! I mixed the kacama leaves with red dates (smashed the red dates), rinse the dried kacama leaves once, boil the handful of smashed red dates, a handful of kacama leaves and 2 litres of water for a while only, then simmer for 30 minutes, sieve before drink.

Do it at least three times in a month, recommended for old ladies who have migraine and insomnia, old women if you want nice complexion and old men who have prostrate problem.

Note: Always see doctors when your headache persists and please read the precautions from the website attached

http://www.rootdown.us/Herbs/Yi+Mu+Cao

Kuching people are very lucky, you can buy a package of dried kacama leaves less than RM5.00 (US$1.5)

This is one of the kacama seedlings in my garden.

MY CHILDHOOD IN KUCHING II

Somehow my mommy could dig out my subconscious fright!

http://moneytaitai.blogspot.com/2012/07/my-childhood-in-kuching-i-somehow-my.html


Nagged by Little Money’s Mom

 

Mom wants to be a writer since I was born, recently she begins to read those thick astronomy books, and she loves to tell me her version of science fiction stories, sometimes when I got quite confused she would said I was stupid, hmmm ..... in that case I felt glad that EEs (Aunties) called her bipolar! When she told me those terms like supernova, big bang, time lapse etc. but I only learned those new vocabularies without actually knowing their real meaning.
   She said good books will make people half-believing what the writer wrote, like a conman cheating someone to believe what he had said! May be she is quite right, look at JK Rowling wrote the magic book, most kids really believe what she wrote in her book. Mom said a good book can “cheat” readers “temporary” during the time when they read it, that’s considered a successful book.
   One day suddenly she told me doom day may happen on Dec 21st or Dec 23th, she said if we still survive peacefully she will celebrate grandly for my 10th birthday on the Boxing Day! That's something nicest she said to me in recent months!

Recently my mom loves to caution me of what will those tragic things possibly happen during doom day. She warned me that I must be prepared psychologically when everyone in the family dies except me alone alive but I can be  ended up being radiated.
   She said I shouldn’t be surprised that there won’t be any mirror existed, if I woke up I could be laying inside deepest part of a  big drain, so if I see spiky hair reflected from the poisoned water she said I should be glad that I have survived and still have a pair of eyes to see things!
   She said bible mentioned that a life dog is better than a dead person! So she said I must continue to live bravely.
   She told me I should learn how use stones to spark a fire, how to learn to cook using woods and charcoal, she has another theory that I may get sucked by a space worm to end up somewhere in the Amazon, either ended up alone or a native girl will want married me!
   She said in some culture married at 10 years old is so normal! She said OR I could be ended up in another younger universe, where I will be hanging out with some old universe coolies, after fifty years later, a civilized white Ang Mo (Red hair) race in the younger universe discovered our existence in the jungle wearing big fig leaves, we will then instantly become famous, these white people use a kind of handphone like in mommy’s story book that can be folded up like a Chinese fan, but when unfolded it will turn into a computer or TV screen. My mom said the headline will read, 'We have found a group of called themselves as La Kian (Uncilivized people in Foo Chow dialect) in a jungle, they said they were once from far away land.'
   My mom said because we were all illiterate and too young when we all got sucked into such younger universe, so when the civilized people asked me where I am originated from but I will not be able to give correct answer, as I don’t know anything what is called “another older universe”, “space worm” and worst she said I also don’t know how to calculate complex mathematics and understand advance science. She said that’s why I must study hard.
   She also said that I shouldn’t laugh at people in the jungle that they are Sakai (Uncivilized natives) like somebody stays next door once nicked name my mom, she said everyone can turn into Sakai if there is really such an existing space worm, mom said she suspect there will be something bigger than worm, called “space blanket”, it will fold part of our universe including our earth to another younger universe, many people will die in this case, especially those who have asthmas.
   I asked mom why? She said people who have asthma always begin to experience breathing difficulties and it usually happened when they are on airplane due to lack of oxygen thus when they can’t breathe they could easily get nervous, so if something unknown happens in such a flash, she said surely my sister will die under such circumstance. So she told me be in aware of such "space blanket" or "space worm" happens in a flash, we will feel weightless, gravity free, like floating, just treat that as a Disney tour newly invented game called “Gravity free converting belt.”

She said hopefully it will happen just a less serious kind of "doom day" of three days darkness without sun, we just need to wear winter coat and hide in the blanket for three days, as she said the heated ground at least can still release some convectional heat after a day, she said the worst if the weather hit more 50 degree Celsius for three days, then the heat will  “slowly cooking” us like she used to simmer those gherkin pickles! I think I understand what she said!
   Then she said if we all die, if I find myself floating in the air but can’t find her and my sister, she told me just asked other people where Jesus stays, she said if she can’t get into the door of heaven, she will wait outside the door just to make sure I enter the gate. She said she is quite sure all my holly grandparents, cousins, uncles and aunties will be there and they can take a good care of me!
   I usually would ask mom to shut up as my head would get bloated after she dug out my deepest subconscious frights, I am actually so scared if she dies!

HOW TO COOK BAMBOO SHOOTS DIFFERENTLY

Let's cook something different from others!

https://www.google.com.my/search?q=petai&hl=en&prmd=imvnsb&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=vV8KUOKzKsH4rQe7qtTICA&ved=0CGQQsAQ&biw=1366&bih=587#hl=en&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=bamboo+shoots&oq=bamboo+shoots&gs_l=img.12..0l10.333236.335451.0.338993.13.10.0.1.1.0.265.1638.0j5j4.9.0...0.0...1c.htSWxX5TjWg&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_qf.,cf.osb&fp=5fa22c23bd386caa&biw=1366&bih=587

https://www.google.com.my/search?q=petai&hl=en&prmd=imvnsb&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=vV8KUOKzKsH4rQe7qtTICA&ved=0CGQQsAQ&biw=1366&bih=587



Written by Little Money's Mom

If you cook, then let’s cook something different from what people usually did or else I think life will be too dull with the same routine, same people and same foods eaten.

It is very rare to find very brave open minded and innovative Foo Chow women in the Foo Chow circle, only very recently I came across my son classmate Marcus’s grandma who is really a very innovative lady, she would brew Foo Chow red wine in a sweet version using Tian Bin, and she also made Ang Chow (Red wine sendiment, sweet but without adding sugar) sauce, my dad said that’s the best ang chow that he ever tasted when I braised it with a big duck.

 You can buy ready-to-cook bamboo shoots from vegetable hawker in Stutong market. Or you can choose a more interesting version by keeping yourself busy, dig some fresh bamboo shoots up from the ground, peel and cook the shoots for two hours, after that soak the shoots in water for two days (keep changing water), only 48 hours later you can prepare to fry the shoots.

Kimball ketup and chili-garlic sauce takaus will be very happy to hear that their red sauce is one of the most important ingredients that I used to fry bamboo shoots.

Ingredients:

(1) A kg of bamboo (cut whatever you wish, Foo Chow loves it big, Taiwanese shredded it, West Msians housewives cut it smaller than Foo Chow Jun nern nern)

(2) Extra virgin black sesame oil (use generously, good for older men)

(3) Ketup and chili-garlic sauce (use generously)

(4) Minced dried prawn

(5) Minced garlic, young ginger and onion + salt

(6) Cut belly part pork into small pieces, marinated with vinegar, wine, garlic and spring onion 

(7) Soy sauce

(8) Shredded Chilies (Optional if only your chili-garlic sauce is not hot enough) and add petai, please read note on the last line)

In a wok, add sesame oil fry 4, 5 and 6 until golden brown, add bamboo shoots fry until almost dry up, then add 3, 7 or optional 8,  if too dry can add some water. Garnish with spring onion.

Special note:

If you add petai to fry with bamboo shoots, the petai will taste "sweet" instead of a peculiar bitter taste.

HOW TO COOK DURIAN FLOWERS

LAZY LITTLE MONEY'S MOM FRIED DURIAN FLOWERS AND BRAISED PORK
As a poor but "versatile mom", I would cook anything that reached my hands!


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Durian
http://durianon.tripod.com/id41.html
http://dqfarm.blogspirit.com/archive/2009/04/19/rare-receipes-durian-flowers.html


Written by Little Money's Mom






I am scared to walk in the pork or fish monger’s stall, “Come buy my fish (pork)! When I approached nearer, “Take all, I will give you discount!” Sometimes I would carry home white pomfret fish that could last me a month, like this morning I carried home a big pork leg and a RM50 big Ma Giu Fish.

My son's classmate mom gave me a bag of durian flowers, I accepted with great appreciation. The fresh flowers smelt a bit like chrysanthemum. Soak the flower in cold water for a while before cooking it or you can boil it quickly before frying it. It would be nice to stir fry with marinated meat (always marinated with black vinegar, wine, minced garlic, ginger and onion), with minced dried prawn with garlic (chili will be optional) or with sea foods. Garnish with pasley and chives will be nice.

 Second harvest of lima beans, the seeds were given by Money Tai Tai blogspot friend Jerry a year ago, then on Jan  ... took me with quite a surprise, his daughter now is my daughter's classmate.

 Only my west Malaysian friend likes this lima bean young pot, the rest of my Kuching friend asked me, "How to eat it?"

 "How to eat it?" I also didn't know, I planted it again all because the white flowers on the fence looked gorgous! Very often I let the beans dropped to the ground, only this morning, a great idea came to my mind when I was cooking the pork.

 I bought this pork leg from Country Village Unaco, you have to walk toward the back inside the Unaco store. The pig was slaughtered only during early morning, so it wouldn't carry a pecular bad odour that deterred people from approaching the stall. The lady who sells the pork is quite nice, if she was free she would even chat with me, she told me these slaughtered pigs from her stall were rearing by her brother-in-law. She started to sell the pork as early as 6:30am and would usually finished before 10:00am.

I don't really like pork that much, but if the lady twisted my arm to buy pork leg, I would sometimes entertain her. She told me her pork legs were all very well cleaned and chopped into pieces ready to cook.

Note: I notice that Chinese from mainland China would usually cook the meat in the water first (use it to prepare soup later) before it was used for braising. Our Chinese-Malaysians are so lucky, we have plentiful of porks available, we used "first hand" fresh pork for every dish, thus our pork dishes always tasted "sweeter" compared to mainland-Chinese operated restaurants, that's one of the reasons why their business are not as good as local Chinese operated restaurants.


The following was how this lazy little money's mom cooked her pork:

(1) Wash the pork with vinegar, salt and water
(2) Put the pork in a big pot
(3) Two big garlic, get rid of garlic skin, dump in the pot
(4) Pluck two fresh basil shoots wash and dump in the pot
(5) Four cardamom seeds, wash and dump in the pot
(6) Sprinkle in some good Ang Mo wine vinegar or Chinese black vinegar
(6) Sprinkle in Chinese soy sauce
(7) Sprinkle in Foo Chow wine (if you can produce sweet one is even better)
(8) Sprinkle in hawthorn vinegar
(9) Sprinkle in extra virgin black sesame oil
(10) Sprinkle in oyster sauce
(11) Sprinkle in some black pepper corns


Let it cooks for two hours, only add in hot water when the sauce begins to dry up. Then with hot water together add the fresh LIMA BEANS from your garden. Simmer for another 30 minutes before serving.



Note: I share with you this recipe, all because my son's tuition teacher Ms. Chai said the smell released from the pot was really good!

MY CHILDHOOD IN KUCHING I

Somehow my mommy could talk for my subconscious mind!

Nagged by Little Money’s Mom

When my younger sister quarreled with me, usually I would be lazy to response, as she always wanted to win for everything, e.g. she said she wanted mommy’s 100% love and demanded mom that she could only lavish me 30% love or else she would get very angry like the angry bird, she asked mommy to give her 10 kisses but didn’t allow me to kiss mommy.

  

   My little sister is very childish; I would usually reply her, “Meow!” That mean I treated her like a puppy, as I noticed that the little puppy always loves to bark at the cat for attention!

My mom said those boys in my classmates talk like adults; they are almost as tall as my dad and could talk to her more mature than my dad! She also said that they could become a father without a problem; I wonder what she was talking.

   Then Aunty Annie came to scene, she told my mom, ‘Don’t get disappointed of your childish son, he is very smart, you don’t know what those moms fed their boys, do you notice that these days amongst the most talented, most artistic, most eligible bachelors are mostly not straight? You notice that our old days boys only started to know what is called studying until form 5 or form 6?’

   Anyhow my mum still think that I am stupid, she said those teachers and friends of hers whoever said that I was smart must be as smart as me, so don’t you think she was hinting to me that those teachers and her friends are stupid like me?

You know I hate to memorize those BM compositions, Chinese compositions, luckily there is no English composition yet.

   During exam, I hated to keep writing those repeated A to Z letters composition, instead I chose to draw cartoons or turn those ABC into different fond, which were a lot more fun.

   My Ann EE’s graphic designer friends all thought that I am a genius, I love to hear it but my mum’s face turning black whenever she thought I would become a “go bald headed” advertising executive, she said if anything goes wrong that I don’t want to have a girlfriend then my “Chinaman” dad will curse her even she goes to live in 11th dimensional hyperspace.

Anyhow, my life was changed completely after I moved to Kuching 4 years ago, my mom used to be a career woman, she didn’t need to worry if my dad didn’t send her our monthly expenses in the middle of a month, but now I often heard her cursing at "someone looks like me" at weird hours in the morning when something went wrong especially when she couldn’t get help from anyone.

   Mom didn’t allow us to mess up the house, she would wipe the floor four times a day, so whenever I spitted something on the floor, usually I would secretly wipe it off, but she still found it out, because of stickiness.

   She said if I wanted to cheat, better cheat and tell lies smartly of not being caught, she said my cheating and lies reminded her of "someone looks like me", don’t you think she meant that’s the person who contributed me the Y-chromosome?

   After four years studying in Chinese primary school, finally I can speak Mandarin better than those banana-cousins of mine in NZ, Australia and USA, and I can read Chinese comics and newspapers too, but during exam, my Chinese is still the last in class like the rest of my subjects, my mum said except my English was a bit better than the rest or else for sure I would sure score the last in class.

   She said that's why she regretted to get married, she was slow, she only started to know what was called studying when she was 18 years old, and she met an as equally slow dad except his mouth was always faster than his brain and his eyes, that's why she got unlucky and hooked, I wonder what mom was talking.

   Anyhow, she concluded that that's why I am an ultra slow person as the result of the slow biproducts, she told my dad, "Don't expect yourself to become a grandpa when you are 70 years old! The average age for your son likely to get married will be at 38, that's the added and divided result of our marriage age!"

My favorite task is always catching grasshoppers after school inside the school compound and my classmates always complained to my mum, 'Aye, he is catching grasshoppers again!' Anyhow, my mom never forbid me, she would come late to pick me up after school that gave me suffficient time to catch the grasshoppers, she said I was merely looking like her, because she was a "grasshoppers-catcher king" when she was a child.

I caught the grasshopper-brother and its little sister too

 

One night right after 9pm, when mom flickered her fingers softly over the 88 keys, suddenly we heard pebbles dropping sound and followed by loud curses that we all couldn't hear clearly, anyhow mom said luckily we didn't hear clearly so that we didn't need to get angry at childish people. Then the following night when there was no dog's barking, mom told us to expect the annoying alarm sound, true enough, mom was like a witch she could tell what would happen! She said in life, when people thought that you were not threatening enough to them, they would bully you, but she said sometimes it is not neccessary to retaliate, as dog barked at cat, dog would be harrassed by naughty kids, naughty kids would be scolded by their parents, weren't she hint me not to make fun of my Teacher Yu's Hu Lee Dog?

 

Mom got angry, she said this was the SILENT LANGUAGE of how my classmates OSTRICIZED me in class. She said this is usually happened in Chinese school as they placed academic results as the most important of all activities. She said if I was not the top three counting from the bottom then I wouldn't be treated this way. She said this picture will be an evident, if I turn into somebody in the future, then the whole Malaysian education system has to change its instructional methods, but if I turn into a nobody, that must be caused by the overdosing of antipressant when I was in her tummy, she said that's the most regretful thing she did in her life was to swallow antidepressant when she was not depressed, she said usually pregnancy makes women more stupid and indecisive, I wonder she was talking senses or not, only one day if I become a scientist to figure it out!
Note: One day I peeked my classmate Megan's Chinese composition, she said she wished that I would be transferred to other school!

 

Mom said every morning after sending us to school, she would be caught in traffic jam where no police would come to regulate the heavily jammed traffic along this poor men street, she said jams in rich men streets or other lane would usually move fast except on this poor men lane!

Mom said this lane is like the little China, to proof this is the poor men lane, she said just needed to observe if the motocycles are more than cars!

She said rich men never could fathom how poor men live, rich men would think that they are born to be superior and they would usually think poor people are stupid and lazy thus why they deserve to be poor! She said not many people would realize that rich men would keep an eye on poor men to make sure they don't get rich to gain a new rival to them. She said big fish eats small fish to get fat, but never small fish gets fat by eating big fish but small fish would eat smaller fish to get bigger!

 

Mom said it is just a few kilometers lane, but the jam would usually take her twenty minutes to reach home

 

She wondered why police never would come to regulate traffic jam in the poor men lane.

 

She said just a little way up from the poor men lane to Jalan Alwi, the road was named after one of the richest man, I heard that he was once my grandpa's classmte who once owed the most lands in Kuching, thus she called that as rich men lane, where Lodge International School is along the way.

 

Mom said all these cyclists wish that they have cars too, look at the way they risked their lives to ride in between the double lane! Amongst all those mom's nags, I still really don't understand what mom was talking!