Monday, April 26, 2010

Goodies in Kuching City May 2010





Recommended by Mrs. Money

An equatorial haven in Kuching .... out of my expectation, a very relaxing place to eat, to see, to rest ... if you want you can stay here and pets lovers even can bring along their pets.




The Secret Sanctuary Boutique Hotel cum Restaurant
133, Taman Stutong Indah,
93350 Kuching, Sarawak, Malaysia
Phone:082-363001
HP: 0198888986

Restaurant opens from 7:00 to 24:00
(But please make reservation)


120 days of year 2010 just vapourized out of our awareness, somewhere in silence is urging me everyday, " ... don't drag on anymore, it's time to send your work to your editor, May should be your deadline ....."
"Hi.... I have excuses..... my kids were sick, then I was sick, then my kids got sick again and then when I kissed them I got flu again.... "
Hmmm... if I want to give excuses, there are uncountable, in this case I have to work and plan in advance for certain things in life, so for the month of May, I will have more time to sit down at home meeting my deadline!


Mr. Money's birthday coming soon on May, each year I tried weeks or even months earlier looking for a suitable celebration venue. Today I finally have located one just somewhere near my neighbourhood, I appreciate my old friend Jen who bought me and even invited me for such a nice siesta hours lunch.




The owner's name is Cyril Lim, he is a person with good taste, multi-talented and very artistic. He is also a home and landscape designer, browse through his Secret Sanctuary then you will truely appreciate what he has done to the nature and how he could bring art to our equatorial landscape. The Secret Santuary keeps under constant motification, renovation and upgrading for a better ambient.
Cyril is really creative when coming to design water scenes: If under the rain I could imagine the scene like Debussy's "Garden under the rain"; For other sunny days, I would call this as the "Garden under the flowers"; these purple flower creepers are droping from the sky (from the netting above) kissing towards the water.



Another room with equatorial setting design


You can pay a certain amount and enjoy the day trip here by relaxing and swimming in the pool with equatorial motif. This relaxing place gives holistic curing and facial services too.



If you don't look the net above, you would think that it's natural!


Good fish feng shui decorative item placing on a right direction


These red laterns would look too worldly if ended up on downtown streets, but here the red brightened the brown wooden furnitures with good taste


Japanese carps are swimming happily with clean unsmelly water


Good coffee, Korean kimji, Japanese squids and seaweed pickles, these are few of my favorite things!


First time I tried the Sarawak natives' ginger shoots, it's a wonderful exotic dish! Taste good too!


Cyril Lim with RTM Broadcaster Jennifer Lau, they have been long time friends.


The sauce made with basils


Cyril's girlfriend Julia prepared us this ultra thick sandwich filled with different goodies.



Healthy colorful and sweet treats!


There are few smart dogs and a black healthy cat in Cyril's Secret Santuary, one of his dogs got such feat of jumping and standing on a bar and roof! He said he welcomes pets, so good news for those who love pets. I will sure bring my kids along, but I think those pets might end up hiding under the stove!



This Yong Tao Fu soup with added Fu Joo is a very unique combination, must try when you come here for breakfast or light lunch!

Monday, April 19, 2010

SOME OF THE YOUNGEST BULLIES BUDDED IN SCHOOLS


Realistic experiences were always worst than nightmares



"...... if you really got bullied, it’s no harm from time to time to swear a bit, it’s like farting but too much of it won’t do you good at all!”


Written by Mrs. Money




I am just one of the tolerated surviving victims, under prolonging abused by bullies cum maliciously bullied incidents plotted and created deliberately by bullies from business, school days and even own family since tender age of 7 years old until to this middle age.

These days, some of those bullies in my eyes looked more like a group of howling dogs and wolves whenever they saw a cat, they would haunt after it, either for a merely fun threat or real threat.

For years I studied silently of bullies’ mentalities behind the whole howling threat dirty games ….. in their consciousness minds they are actually egoists but locked inside terrible hidden subconscious minds conflicted actually with ultra inferior complexities, usually from their stereotype mafia outlook, sumo physical size, uncontrolled fat, ugliness superimposed with unapproachable air and fierce chilling scintilating evil glance and with many weaknesses which they used materialistic luxury things, lies with weasel claims and bullied weaker people to give them a sense of control, domination and power to boost their confidents and unseeingly handicaps.

For lady-bullies, in short I dub them as witches! You will be surprised that usually they are sweetest with smoothiest talks under the sun and appeared most holy in their religion, usually they don't need to threat you physically directly instead by just verbally mention their mafia father-in-law or brother-in-law's infamous name. But, these lady-bullies will turn into a complete babarians when they begin to avoid responsibilities and bullied victims under closed doors with most babaric unreasonable invented blood coughing lies and wrongful accusations, insults and humiliations!


In conclusion, these cunning bullies are exceedingly cunning, if they give you sweet smiles, smooth talks and calculative helps, you will think that they might be a santa claus magically appeared right near your side! I also notice that bullies will appreciate and admire other bullies, they are attracted to each others, thus bullies choose their bullies partners to extend their bullies' population.

There is such particularly a group of bullies (family-related) with triad background began to emerge right at the starting of my career in an oil town. Like every bullies, before taking actions, they would check the background of targets. For years, this bullies' family members all thought that I am very scared of them, so they would deliberately showing up their presence in my milieu and working place, in short, they are urging for my attention. As it a group of dog or wolves, as soon as they smelt the presence of a cat even out of their sights, they would keep scratching with their paws on the brick fence, keep howling, jumping up and down, the intention was to make the cat in the garden behind the brick wall raised its fur like a snow ball, its tails swung side to side hissing angrily.

One of the latest incident before I sold off my businesses in an oil town was such bullies' family newly joined gang would even come in an extend in a disguise to my office asking for a job, then of course she would get whatever she wanted at the end of her resignation, she would be daring enough not to write any resignation letter requested by me and she would leave the job without telling me the exact day of her resignation.

Twice I encountered the nastiest "bully head" of this bullies' family in a shopping mall walking towards me in an opposing direction, but soon I could see from the side glass panel reflections ….. he would deliberate stop walking by turning his short fatty necked head slowly in adagio speed of an 180 degrees to look towards my proceeding direction very fiercely.

Then when I first moved to Kuching a year ago, one day I was filling gas in a Petronas gas station, there was a big Mercedes stopped right at the back of my car blocking in a 90 degrees direction, I began to sense that someone was looking direct at me from the Mercedes but without filling his gas from the way he parked and sat in his car, very obviously he was trailing after me after discovering me in a certain intersections. I merely took a glance; this similar "bully head" again emerged, why he never stops haunting after me since 16 years ago when I first started setting up my business in an oil town? He gave me a prank call on the very first week during my new business opening; he would probably never realize that I have such a recorder-like memory for such unique husky voice timbre, “How much you charge?” he asked with kind of broken English. So I gave him an amount.
“I give you RM800, can? I will come later!” It took me a while to realize that he wanted to let me know that he was treating me as a prostitute! This familiar husky timbre would only begin to resonate three years later when he began to set up a business with his relatives when they just returned from overseas.

Well, I ignored his fierce staring and drover off my car in a zoom after the filling, may be he saw that I was driving a used 20 over years old car so he wanted to show me his newer Mercedes, but only God knows where he got his money from so that he could show off to me! Imagine if I was driving a shinny Ferrari four wheels drive; there would be another wrongful created accusations dropping out of nowhere right in front of me again threatening for money by then instead of just merely demanded me to get out of the town within 24 hours or put block red letters of apology for half page on the first page of newspaper for a week cum a feast of 10 tables.

For almost one and a half decade in an oil town, I didn’t walk in any of the Churches for a Sunday service, first time after 16 years, I thought for a change in my life when I first moved in Kuching. I walked in a Church near my neighborhood, due to my daughter at first didn’t let me go away from her Sunday school class, by the time I entered the sanctuary, all the seats were fully occupied, so I chose a folding seat with the ushers limped on the wall right at the back. Soon the pastor asked whosever were new comers but not being announced to their raise hands, my raised hand unfortunately provoked my least unexpected "bully head's attention, very soon he began to take action, he slowly again in adagio speed began to raise from his seat, deliberately walked down from the aisle towards the back, made a 90 degrees turn, passed me and walked closer a bit when approaching me, threw me a closer threatening smiley look through corner of his eyes to me, then he walked out of the sanctuary exit, I deliberately took out my watch to count seconds, only within 30 seconds, he opened the sanctuary door and walked in again, again threw me another threatening evil mockery glance through corners of his small eyes and walked towards his seat somewhere in the center. I deliberately observed for the nest following two months, but ever since then I never saw him walking out of the sanctuary half way during service as I was smartly hiding somewhere that I would be able to see him but he wouldn’t be able to see me.

I heard my friends told me this "bully head" would usually threat unfortunate “victimized cats” for cash money, he threatened them to ask gangsters going after them. Most decent foo chow peoples and their chicken friends are the ones who are always most scared of gangsters and thus easily got trapped, tricked and being victimized; I don’t like the traditional Chinese way of bowing to rich peoples even they were once a mafia, smugglers or wicked nastiest bullies. I learned that recently there was such a “big cat” asked for debts owed by this “bully head” wolf, instead the "bully head” wolf threatened to call for gangsters to go after him, but the “big cat” was actually a tiger, the tiger went to police directly reporting someone threatened him; eventually the tiger got his money back from the "bully head".

Another of my worst experience with bullies was the association with foo chow white hair tai tai with her foo chow god son. Both of them singing duets plotting their desired stories together, gossiping their version of dramas, directing, acting and they both were intending to destroy my pride thoroughly, to delay my recuperations emotionally and to defame my limited surviving integrity and booming career. The most unforgivable arrangement was they plotted secretly behind me with "bully head" and his family gangs to let me drop into their trap for an unforgettable abused. I recalled when I moved out of sight from white hair tai tai to a new venue to continue my business, she again acted like an attention deprived wolf, within a month of my moving, she probably finally located where I moved to, so she would ask a group of her friends, deliberately sat in a coffee shop nest to my business venue, when I parked my car, my staff alerted me, “See who sat in the coffee shop?”
I told my staff, “Don’t worry, this cat also got two holes in her dwelling place too! Let’s pretend that we didn’t see them sitting down there waiting for us, just walk directly towards our back entrance!”


Yesterday, around recess time, my son’s teacher reported to me guiltily: I just punished your son (standing), I told him, “No problem, you can let him eat rotan if he gets naughtier.” I trusted the teacher, I think he is a very good disciplines and experience teacher. But no matter how good and reputed a school in with its disciplinary and academic results, bullies somehow never diminished because of its students come from families with different education, cultural and family backgrounds. Schools with rich kids, ones can’t say there are no kids there with parents who got rich indecently and schools of mediocre kids, ones even can’t tell which kids’ parents are wealthy or very finely educated and cultivated. So bullies are everywhere in high percentage appeared during our very young age might even last to our last breath, only through hysterical sobbing tears and bad experiences, we develop our six-sense and we learn to detect nastiest disguised bullies even from our first association with them or even could simply smell them from distance away. Like a cat with sharp sense of smell to detect a dog or wolf even it was disguised with sheep furs!

If we leave our kids too well protected under ten commandments teaching, Confucianism teaching and your own version of theoretical moral and ethical standards, no four letter words, no foul words or no swear words, they easily will be the victim of bullies. So when they start to go to school, if they don’t know the meaning of “fxxk you” as you always forbid to let them know such foul words, soon they will learn from their classmates, they will store those foul words faster in their brain and longer in their memory than other decent English words, until one day your kids fighting amongst themselves, all a sudden you hear “fxxk you” from one of them. If you make your kid eats rotan, he might accumulates this hatred to one of the later day by questioning you, “Why don’t you tell me earlier that it is a bad word forbidden to say? I didn’t even know the meaning, but only the fiercest boys in my class who usually said the words and everyone would laugh!” These days, kids also easily picked up foul words from internet, one day my friend showed me my son’s writing words: Fxxx and Gxx Dxxx Yxx. The first word I understand it that he could have learn it from me, but the other word I even have to ask my friend its meaning, so I knew that he copied down both somewhere from internet.

My siblings once laughed at me that my kid first vocabulary would be, “Shxxt!” So I told them this:

Do you know what kind of ladies love to say 4 letter words? The answer is “ladies of the night”. Why all ladies of the night love to swear foul words? As most of them were from unhappy broken families, they were abused and bullies even by their closest kindred, women and men who were supposedly their good role models during their grown up stage instead they were worst than nightmares realistic bullies and abusers, thus when they came to the most inferior moment without any good mental support and guidance, they succumbed themselves as mistresses or prostitution to earn a living, subjected to further abuses, sorrows and bullies. So a girl from a happy background, they simply don’t need to swear with their shallow emotional outbursts.

Sometimes bullied persons not just being bullied by bullies, another worst than nightmare reality could be a wrongly accusation incident trapped up by stuck-up stories tellers, from there the stories tellers could created a grand “show” to directly press and bully the victim.

There was an incident, I was wrongly accused by my mentally handicapped aunt and my old age grandma who blindly believed her daughter’s lies. My grandmother was an accuser and my parents were dragged in as victims subjected to be bullied, I don’t side anyone up to these days as all of them they were my closest kindred. But these days I got brain enough to think my grandma … she merely wanted to find a fault on my ultra patience parents to provoke a fight, ended up both my guiltless submissive parents have to knee in front of my grandma subjected to her almost abusive disposal of tantrums, the incident always was an iceberg for my grandma to find excuses to fight especially with my mom for many years until the day my grandma deceased. You know that made me feel very guilty! That’s the hidden side of my sorrowed and semi-withdrawal limited my mental openness and absorption to percept new knowledge and education during my young days in Malaysia. The unhappy incident also made me treated my family members in aloof manners, I wouldn’t miss anyone of them much, in short, I become quite a senseless girl!

The incident happened when my mentally retarded aunt was actually sweeping on ground floor, while my elder sister who could read newspaper (primary 4), she was telling and showing me a picture that somebody married naked posted in the newspaper on the first floor, but my mentally retarded aunt caught my last indecent word, very soon she rushed to the first floor looking for her mom, “E Ma, Ah WWW said that you are very hiaw!” My sister was the sole witness that I didn’t say such word, but no matter how we tried to convince my grandma that I didn’t say that she was very hiaw, she would insist I said it, besides making a scene to my parents, soon all our relatives and closer friends believed my old grandma’s words too, so I became such a notorious girl in my family circle from that day onwards. This incident also caused my late marriage and never too keen to stay with in-laws. You think any of our families’ circles of friends would like their kids to get married with a notorious girl like me from that day onwards?

We usually heard of family fights happened often to old Chinese families amongst in-laws, but by dragging in a very young merely a 7 years old kid, wrongly accused and used her as a fight provoking culprit is hardly heard right, and my grandma was an educated Chinese lady from mainland China, she could write, read and even play piano!

In my career life, when I got to face another of such ill-fated wrongly accusations' incident by above mentioned "bully head"'s family and it really formed a permanent scar to my optimistic views towards very cautious doubtful life. I was so unlucky that even a newly opened business center by a young couple with their "bully head" brother-in-law would make up several wrongful accusation stories which I never did and said, first they demanded their LM product agent in KL to write a warning letter (and CC them a copy) by asking me to stop using their LM products, (actually I didn’t have any of such LM products, LM contact, revelant documents or even information in my hand before they sent me the wrongly accused letter) and I was informed by my friends that these young couple from "bully head"'s family would show the wrongly accusation letter carbon copy from KL LM product managing director to show their ignorant customers to “proof” that I was stealing their LM product!

Later I discovered that this plot (plotted by whom? I think they were all dog ate dog amongst LM dealers themselves!) began when their own LM product representative dealer from Sibu town began approaching my long acquainted trading supplier in Kuching, so my supplied called me up and asked me, "Could you do a favour by borrowing your venue for a man now sits right infront of me for a seminal?"
"I don't have time, but I can borrow the venue for you."
"Don't worry he said he will arrange everything, you just get the place ready. If you are interested, you are invited to join the seminal."
"Sure."
Of course this stranger never mentioned to me or my Kuching supplier that he would be promoting such LM product in which would be directly crossing someone else's territory.
On the day just an hour before the seminal, the LM dealer from Sibu showed up my venue, after he explained to me the LM product, I told him very bluntly that I was not interested on his LM product (by the time I still didn't aware he was invading his own LM dealer's territory or else I would have stop him at once) at all as I had my own created product (which I think was ten times better, as I had made a research for three years before creating my product) and I was already selling my own CVC in the market for a year.

So after few weeks of such seminal, I received the wrongly accused letter by LM product MD Mr. Frk Ho which was hanged over persoinally to me by the "bully head" and he threw me some very loud, rude and threatening words. Immediately I called the LM product dealer of Sibu to condemn him after the whole mess with me involved directly in with an obvious gangster, he at last blurted out, “I had heard that this newly opened oil town new LM franchised dealer was your secret rival hidden in the dark!”
"I don't know about them, I don't know they are my secret rival. You go settle your own mess, I was just borrowing venue for you. "
"Sorry, I didn't know the man is a gangster from a triad."


Without my knowledge, the Sibu LM dealer deliberately did the crossed over town LM products sales by choosing me as a scapegoat (actually I just kindly borrowed him my venue not involving anything of what he was doing) he supposedly shouldn’t do it other then Sibu town. Of course from my Kuching supplier, KL LM agent to Sibu LM dealer all escaped their responsibilities for such a mess; Anyhow the LM agent from KL with the MD named as Mr. Frk Ho never even scolded his own Sibu LM dealer instead this Mr. Ho simply wrote a wrongly accusation letter to me, a total stranger? Worst still Mr. Frk Ho's secretary wouldn't let me talk to him, actually I wanted to ask this Mr. Frk Ho of LM KL that if I never even contacted him how could I organize a LM product seminal without getting any of his products, revelant documents and training? And how could he simply write an wrongly accused letter instead he should condemn and give warning his own LM dealer from Sibu!
I summed up these 3 group of wolves cum their respective selfish dog ate dog plans and plots were aiming their 3 arrows to kill this scapegoat, in short I was being used, bullied and abused for their own respective benefits and selfish targets.

Soon 40 days later, behind me obviously white hair tai tai had approached and contacted the "bully head and his family members" or vice versa for a plot to nail me down alone for an abuse. When they reached white hair tai tai's office, white hair tai tai was flattered by them as a “most kind and most fair judge in the whole world”, white hair tai tai cheated me by telling me to attend the parley as long as telling them the truth that I didn’t sell their IM product, then it would be fine. But ……. I got cheated into a pirate ship…. first I was accused wanting to bomb their business premises out of my awe! (My friends told me: You were here in town more than three years earlier than them, if you are a violent person, you already said that and did that to other business rivals, and he is not the only one who has a degree or a master degree!”)
Immediately one of the "bully head"'s family bitch from IM product barked, “You steal our IM product, which we are the franchised owner.”

“I can create and write a product of my own product, why then I have to steal from you?”
“YES, YOU DID…. YOU DID!”
“Look white hair tai tai, look at these young couple …. my in-laws, they are good youngsters, innocent and ignorant. But I tell you, this ZZZZZ is a very cunning lady, she is a very bad girl, nasty girl and she bullied my two in-laws”

(During that time I still didn’t even know very much about the background of this "bully head" from oil town IM product, but how could he made such defaming remarks about my personality if I didn't know much about him? Of course under the situation when white hair tai tai kept banging at her table loudly, by insulting and wrongly accusing my decent integrity and very soon she even demanded me to shut up to let others’ to further insulting on me. I could see from that point that white hair tai tai already nailed me to a dead sentence the minute she nailed me down in her office for their planned ahead abusing plot when I faxed my documents to a law firm.)
“I had 9 persons trained under my CVC product a year ago before you even not yet opened your business, besides that there were recording of more than 100 users already!”
Very soon the bitch twisted and created her next version of story to bully me, “I heard someone told me you wrongly accused us of stealing your product!”

(Not everyone is useless and uncreative, barbarians! They have to use other people’s product, but I could create my own product! If I never treated them as even a rival, how could I get interested in anything they did? Obviously people from a particular bigger town in Sarawak state has such bias minds set against humble folks from smaller towns)

All a sudden white hair tai tai and her god son could catch me a right time , when I was faxing in her office by tricking and locking me in her office, she even forbidding me to get out making a phone call my sister. (When I sensed that the arrangement and timing were sinister)
So white hair tai tai deliberately wanted me to be left alone facing the two hours none ceasing insults, humiliates and wrongfully accusations by the strangers from the oil town IM product dealer.

I was not interested in LM product and initially I never knew that those dubs really seriously considered me cum wrongly accused me of stealing their product, how could I accused them or told anyone that they stole my CVC product, if my CVC product, revelant document and training information were safely in my safe?

(Those dubs thought that I was born in a small town thus they undervalued my talents and abilities? When one of the couple actually didn’t earn any degree but they were scared that I exploited it? Actually I knew nothing about it until one of their Church friends revealed me their lies and these days I was told that she even dared enough to post her fake degree in their blogspot! Very obviously her harassing was intentionally barking loudly enough to make me scared of them and eventually avoided them!)

The triad walked off happily finally with whatever things that they could abused, wrongfully accused, humiliated and insulted me for flat two hours, and even warned me that I shouldn’t tell this incident to anyone or report to the police.

In a Chinese and a certain religious oriented circle, even I was a real bullied victim, yet I was threatened not to tell this incident or even talk about this incident to anyone, even my family members forbid me to talk, they thought that it would be safer for me, but the folks from a religion believed those wolves howling, that certain religion would create a good scenario even better for them to continue telling lies, defaming me and sure enough there were peoples believing what they said under the mutual trust of ‘brothers and sisters in CXXXXX!’ I wonder if a certain religion would be able to train their worshipers’ for critical listening!

Any God grace happened to me? Nope or never yet! I only have bad ill lucks and fates one after another, with those haunts kept haunting ceaselessly after me, sometimes made me wondered if there is such thing called recarnation … If I ever owed them something my last life? That’s why caused them to keep haunting after me in this life? … or may be they have to repay me in my next life?!

Muted bullied incident happened in childhood and career led me to hysterical cries in many nights and melancholy days. I learned that in Chinese family, no one would go to a certain extend to understand my problem, when ill fated things never happened to them, they got no experience to deal with me. If I complained wanted to divorce when I got pregnant… imagine if a bird wanted to lay egg, but there was no nest, would the bird cry?

So there were always some smart rich lucky cookies siblings decided I was under depression, thus I was tricked to Singapore to get lock up in the Mt. E stress ward without any notice, when I reached the stress ward, all my documents, HP and handbag were all taken away. I got to my sense knew that I was tricked, so I was acting very cooperative (imagine, if I got angry and screamed loudly, they would sure give me an injection to silence me).
Now, if you want to know how I rested in such a stress ward? I would like you to buy a VCR of Chinese Children Cartoon called ‘WONDERINGS OF SANMAO’, there was an episode when a group of boys and girls scouts from wealthy and prestigious families decided Sanmao was a depressed wonderings kid needed to be admitted to a stress ward, eventually Sanmao got locked up in the ward amongst actor and artist manias that caused him sleepless night and almost his life! My experience was I got a “male fan” who would always stand beside my bed looking at me first thing in the morning when I opened my eyes during my short morning slept, he always gave me a scare, I was cool minded enough not to scream, I was afraid of the injection that temporary made me felt senseless! There were some manias would scream most of the time, I learned that many rich and famous families actually reluctantly sending their “gila” family members to an asylum but to the stress ward for covering purpose. (Rich peoples want face!)

Eventually I chose the best sanctuary of the world to have my kids born in New Zealand, where I could get best counseling, I was diagnosed not as a depression person but with view points, life experiences and outlook of life differently from normal people and my siblings, if I was able to mix with people who had as ill-fated experiences as me, we could be able to share and not being treated as abnormal, because we are the very tough survivors, we never thought of jumping off from 10th floor to end our lives when we were bullied and badly wrongfully accused of something we never did or said.

I remember when ex-staff (who is the very new member of bully head's family) once she resigned and went on opening her own business, she would admit to a customer that she knew all my products sales price and secret trade, even if I didn’t accuse her as spy, she would admit it herself stupidly to her customers. I recalled she always complaint to me about her KL ex-boss who didn’t pay her salary for few months, so she resigned her job …. (as it I would be another bad boss who would act like her ex-boss, eventually my prediction was correct, she lashed her revenge on me of her angers towards her ex-boss), I never mistreated her, I even paid her higher than other old staff unfairly which created a lot of noises which she never realized, and I never realized she didn’t earn any diploma certificate to entitle that kind of higher pay than other much more experienced and qualified staffs only right before she resigned. Right before and after her resignation she did many bloody hells unkind things to me even I gave her some generous gifts for her new business: I learned a hard lesson that some ingratitude youngsters only used their mouth to say appreciate things, yet in action they did very reverse things!

As bad fates and foul mouths as those ill-fated prostitute, I blurted during outburst with all four letter words but I would tell my kids, “Look these are adults’ bad swearing words, you can’t say it, if I hear it from your mouth I will make you eat rotan. Only if you grow big enough like mommy, you know the meaning, if you really got bullied, it’s no harm from time to time to swear a bit, it’s like farting but too much of it won’t do you good at all!” Sometimes I really think that I am too hurt to have a happy marriage life, too sorrowful have a happy family and too much agonies that can live normally like other lucky folks who never live through their lives in rough turbulences.

I think to leave kids too innocent won’t help them much, if you don’t teach them recognize what are those good words and bad words, sooner they will learn those bad vocabularies, bad things and bad experience from out there in school or in the future when they go into their work fields and society. In retaliation most of them could become withdrawers either as periodic depression victims or sudden violent manias.

I was a victim of bullies from primary 1 to 6 even in a very small town Chinese school in the early 70s, I remember there were two group of girls from my batch, both of these two rival tai chea tai (little female mafia) were the two best athletes, the worst feeling for me was when both of them rejected me to involve in their respective gang. Everyday I would return home told my parents that I got bullied, but all of them would ignore my childish words. From time to time these tai chea tai would order a boy to bully me, when I was in primary 6, as I got a mole above my left lip corner, one day the fattest boy (he was the tai ko tai, the best athlete in school) asked me to turn my head looking at him, then I saw him using a 2B pencil and a sharpener’s mirror tried to draw a mole above his left lip. Then came to the classroom duty of sweeping floor, most of the time kids were so nasty that they would sweep the rubbish to the other unclean section of desks and chairs to save them from dumping rubbish by walking over a distance to toilet where they always said got ghosts there, only the gang of tai chea tai allowed to monopoly bad deeds, once I suddenly realized what they dirty deed was, so I deliberately swept to their section like they used to do on mine more than dozen times, but very soon as there were their spies around reported back to them, they would call upon the class prefect, I remember his name with a ball sound, he was rolling very fast when coming to listen to tai chea tai’s words, he came with a gang of tai chea tai, spies and cronies, ordering me to sweep their section immediately. Actually I was quite sure they hadn’t sweep their floor that day as I saw tons of rubbish over their side, that’s why provoked me to revenge. But I learned from my primary school days lesson that: FOR SURE BULLIES ALWAYS WIN!!!


Soon after 12 I grew wiser, I decided if I started my transition, I wouldn’t allow anyone to bully me. So surprised to me just that 30 over days holiday break would turn those two tai chea tai to total strangers to almost everyone, they became just two unharmed inactive poodles until form 5. From that secondary first day onwards, I never heard of any such “mafia” gangs being “formed” in school.

It came the time when my son was going to primary one; I was worried that he would become one of the bullies’ victims like my old days. Unfortunately he wears my old shoe now becoming a subject of bullies from today’s report. His nursery teacher informed me in the late afternoon, “He got a scratch at his back, his classmate told me he got pushed by a fat boy called AXXXX and fallen into a sharp thing thus got hurt and I heard that few boys always bullied him in class because he can’t speak Mandarin well enough.”
“Hmm….”
“Then he peek a girl’s underwear from under her skirt!”
“OM… bad shameful news for me! After he did that, what was his reaction?”
“He laughed happily!”
“Well, really silly! In school he got bullied by fat strong boys, in revenge unconsciously when he went to the nursery he bullied the younger quiet girl in his cheeky way!”
Now I finally understand why he often returning home bullied his sister! Well he coped with bullies actually smarter than his old mom, his old mom suffered everything herself to haunt her future life and happiness but many victims would unconsciously revenge it on other weaker victims!

It’s my turn to become a verbal bully threatens, “Let me tell you son, if you touch a girl’s body or peek their private body, their daddies or brothers will be coming to chop off your hands or poke your eyes!”

If there is a haven without liars, bullies or liars cum bullies, only our after physical decayed to transform us to pass through a certain transitional realm, there are many realms, eventually transfer to a realm which suits the nature of the transformed being, it is called heaven or imagine a transformed being is being cast to an incompatible realm…. It’s the hell.

Dog and wolves howl and hunt in group, love to chase after something sometimes just to keep their lives rowdy but cats and big tigers live very independently, prefer quietness and treasure their solitudes and lick their own wounds especially by hiding in a very secluded place. A last reminder for bullies: If you keep haunting and barking to force a cat up to a tree top, you think she will die in your hand? …. You soon barked at to the tree leaves only as she already jumped silently through the roofs to sleep somewhere secluded and serene. This incident happened once to my ultra smart pet cat, eventually I gave those noisy annoying canines some cold showers and they ran off with tail tucked in between their hind legs! I was not surprised after a year later I saw some of these nasty dogs got obvious hot water showers by someone when I drove my car passed through them, they didn’t dare to bark on me anymore, I think these dogs are a lot smarter than some arrogant human beings who both shared similar characteristic!



Scar on my son's back, notified kindly by his nursery teacher


This was what had happened to his white uniform



There were 2 holes punched besides some blood stains

This morning I found the secret weapon in my son's classroom, so when he was pushed by a bully, his back hit the corner here.

http://www.respectu.com/
http://journals.lww.com/jrnldbp/Abstract/2010/01000/Bullying_and_Ostracism_Experiences_in_Children.1.aspx
http://www.apa.org/education/k12/bullying.aspx

Saturday, April 17, 2010

MONKEY STORY



Written by Mrs. Money




My Hong Konger friend told me a monkey’s story a decade ago while we both resided in Brunei: She said there were so many monkeys at her backyards during mangoes season, she noticed especially that there was a grey fat female monkey never wanted to eat any mango from it own family’s territory trees, instead it would always jump to other monkeys' trees to pluck and enjoy others' mangoes, eventually when all others’ mangoes "finished", only his family’s trees still got remaining mangoes!!! My friend told me this fat monkey’s fur is most grossy shinny comparing to the rest, she wondered if we should be nasty, unethical, greedy and immoral like this sly monkey so we can survive in this dog eats dog business world as a winner!

One of my friends like this story very much because he told me once there was such a monkey working in his IT office, when a barely 23 years old young man came for interview, he even brought along a church minister friend of his. He said that once he was working as a minister in a church and got a diploma in IT and also he got two years working experience in KL but he quitted his job when he didn’t get paid for several months by his KL ex-employer.


So my Christian friend employed him immediately, my friend asked him to bring the resume later, but he took my friend’s busyness as an advantage never submitted his resume. Then my friend soon got informed that this new employee was not loyal and reliable:


The new employee would always introduce his boss’s (my friend) potential customers to buy computers from his own relatives’ IT shops and also would always inform his boss’s (my friend) customers he could service their computers privately as well, "I also work part time at home!"

After two years, the new employee decided to resign, but he got such a thick face came asked my friend for permission if he could still work for my friend but only as part timer, his reason was as he just began to open his own new business, he didn't want his income became less, he could be so thoughtless, how about his boss's (my friend) income also became less due to his sem-resignation?! My friend even kindly gave him 30 over old clients for his newly opened business, so he probably thought that my friend must be a very stupid person. As there were another 30 over remaining clients serviced under him which his boss (my friend) kept. But he asked for part time job again from his boss (my friend) after he opens his own business, it was just an excuse for him to take his boss’s (my friend) remaining clients literally either using crook or hook to his new business. He came to an extend telling lies to his boss’s (my friend) clients, “My boss is not an IT technician, I am the only one in the company who can fix the computer and now I work here part time only, please come by my new office to visit!”


Then one after another to his boss (my friend) remaining clients, he distributed his new business name card, but very soon my friend’s wife came in the picture fired such a terrible part-time employee to prevent him for further defamation on her husband.




My friend actually got a degree in IT, but he was busy writing his program and designing software most of the time, servicing computer is a piece of cake for him eventhough he was not trained as a IT technician, since he hired a technician to repair computer for him thus he never need to reveal his “talents”. Soon my friend visited Bintulu found out from an old church friend that his hired employee never was a theological school graduated diploma holder, in an actual fact he didn’t even pass his form 5, yet he began to tell lies since old days, he explained to his church friends that his failure of form 5 was due to he forgot to enter his “written name” to his exam papers. Everyone knows that during exam we entered numbers not names!Think this matter in a lateral angle:


Why this compulsive liar cum smart monkey didn't want to work in his relatives’ computer shops instead of went to his relative's chief rival company? If he worked for his relative, would he be so daring enough to take his relatives' clients as he did literally to his boss's clients? And why he still has such a thick face asking to work for part time after he set up his own new business (under the situation when his ex-boss even kindly and thoughtfully gave him half of the old clients as a gift, he even twisted the fact by telling his relatives that his ex-boss's clients all wanted to follow him to his new business and now his ex-boss hardly have any remained clients and staff) when he was never being a loyal and honest staff for two years of his work!?
In an actual fact, right before he married he resigned his job, and his father-in-law helped him opened a new computer shop. He even told my friend that his father-in-law forced him to open a computer shop thus he had to resign, he even made a scene cried like a baby when my friend was out of town receiving his call,
“Hey, I never bully you, why you cry so loud… where are you now?”
“In the office.”
“Any client?”
“Yes.”
“You better stop crying now!”


After that incident, my friend didn’t feel earning that kind of little profit margin business and often he heard maliciously gossips put out by his ex-staff and also nasty threats by his ex-staff’s father-in-law who is a triad member. My friend eventually closed down his business and moved out of such oil town.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

HOW TO PREPARE MULBERRY TEA



Written by Mrs. Money




Wash and steam (within a minute) your mulberry leaves, dry the leaves inside the car under the hot sun. Around late afternoon you will get the crunchy leaves, take away unwanted parts. Either crunch with your hand or grind with a grinder.


This method of steaming process preparing will produce green coloured mulberry tea.


Mulberry leaves has much higher calcium content than milk, it's definitely an older lady tea!

Spring Time in Kuching!





Written by Mrs. Money



My garden is in its relapse for more than 6 months already, most roses are half wiltered, there was a pinky rose tree which seldom bloomed since they day I grew it but all a sudden it produced so many buds and roses.


Many friends told me roses are most fragile flowers to plant in our weather, that's quite true, in another word, I found out these rose plants are almost acting like my little daughter both need lots of attention!




I love the colour of this rose, under the roof shade, it becomes the best pampered rose plant!
Ignoring becomes the better fate for this climbing rose!




"Aunty Rose"of Kuching 10th mile Rose Garden would be so really thrilled if she sees that this number could produce so many buds and roses at once. Its previous record only bloomed a rose once at a time, I remember "Aunty Rose" asked me worriedly if it bloomed or not, I told her, "Yes, once a while, but just a rose." then told me it's very hard to get even a flower!

Goodies in Kuching City April 2010





Recommended by Mrs. Money

Foo Chow's Favorite Kan Pan Mian and Bian Niuk!

When I was living in Auckland, somebody told me there is a kan pang mian store in Christchurch, she told me, "Someone even missed their flights because 0f waiting for kan pan mian!"

No matter where they go, foo chow miss their kan pang mian even if they have to drive 10 kilometers or take a boat to reach their nostagic kan pan mian!

When I first "migrated" to Kuching, from time to time I visited this kan pan mian on the way to my kids' schools, especially during early morning before 7:00, I always found this hard working couple could always readily prepare their kan pan mian on time for my kids, while proceeding our way to school, often we saw the jet was just on its way ascending headed northwards.

I think this couple would be able to cook for anyone if one is preparing to fly off at 7am MAS flight to Miri, they told me every morning (except Thursday) they reach their store at 5:00am.

I am quite surprised that this couple only entirely preparing foo chow kan pan mian, bian niuk and kong piang, whereas other stores in Kuching would sell varieties of noodles, even though the owner, Mr. Lau's wife is a Cantonese.

This morning my girl was crying didn't want to go to school, Mr. Lau left his cooking to pamper her. I "interviewed" him and his wife while I ate, I found out they have a teenage son and stayed 10 miles away from Kuching city. He was working as a project manager for a very well known grass and aluminium company until he got to an age that climbing high up became a threat for him. Since he was a teenager in Sibu town he got an experience in operating kan pan mian store, so he decided to return this old days job to find a living.

I decided to list his foo chow kan pan mian and bian niuk as goodies inspite the tea and coffee served there in the kopitiem obviously need more improvement! After I ate there for a while Mr. and Mrs. Lau's kan pan mian and bian niuk never out of "quality control", later I even sent my connoisseur old friend and his wife to taste, the test passed with good remarks.



This coffee shop can be seem from Stutong roundabout, toward right side of One TJ.




Hardworking Mr. Lau prepared his regular customers' order



Saturday, April 3, 2010

Not A Single Gift Received
Depend on what profession you are in


Written by Mrs. Money





This is a true story happened in between two brothers’ conversation, one of the brothers is a doctor by profession and another one is merely a civil engineer cum third class sub-contractor. One day the doctor brother tongue-in-cheek questioned his younger brother, “I don’t understand why you have to spend so much money on monthly telephone bills to call up people and spend so much money to buy gifts for people during Chinese New Year for people! Look at me; I was the one patients would keep calling and looking up for me and they would shower me with gifts during Chinese New Year!”


This morning, I opened my son’s wardrobe and I found out most of them are getting too small as for two years I didn’t add on any new shirt for my son since I have quitted my job two years ago. When I worked in an oil town, some grateful friends would always buy shirts and toys for my kids, when I become full time jobless Mrs. Money since I move to Kuching city, needless saying there was not a single gift for the poor kids bringing back home by Mr. Money for past seven years.

I worked for almost 30 years in this Malaysian business world; I have seem how cold and realistic human beings acted. Professions like doctors, general managers and politicians are the ones whom people keep showered them with luxury gifts; these are the best professions with status, money and gifts.

I met a car dealer who told me every year he has to ribbon so many imported cars given by timber tycoons so and so to give to so and so big shots.

Big tycoons always have to bride their big shots, the big shots would in return giving him lots of kan tou, but for small third class sub-contractors is the worst profession amongst all dogs eat dogs professions. To win a contract from a contractor … mostly the big companies, the sub-contractor is in such a position that he has to bride, “pay” and “please” used the pennies and smooth talking to path his ways through, from a big tycoon’s employed general manager to QC in order to win a project, then each monthly payments may not be on time, worst as a third class sub- contractor, along facing the sudden inflation raised of diesels, so how much at the end of the day you think a sub-contractor could earn?

A year ago, I overheard a ED of a big company talked to Mr. Money so rudely, I had a shock of how difficult Mr. Money earned his little pennies, besides sharing some of his hard earned pennies with all along from the top to the bottom, he still has to tolerate those big companies’ management staff abusive words and unreasonable ‘new contracts sanctions’ from time to time, yet still have to bow his head said, “Yes sir, yes sir!” Worst incident was once I overheard a company executive director insulted to Mr. Money this way, “I told you lah, Datuk didn’t want to see you! ……… ” The incident was Mr. Money’s car got stolen on that particular day while waiting in a datuk’s office, when the ED learned probably from Datuk’s secretary that Mr.Money didn’t manage make it to see datuk, he could twist his story maliciously.

When I learned that someone could ‘bark’ to Mr. Money in such disrespect and very rude manner, as a wife, what do you feel when you find out your husband is a nobody in somebody’s eye and while you yourself were fully respected in your past profession?

When I noticed how little Mr. Money is in those QC and ED’s eyes, for six months last year end, I was very sick, hurt and down for a while, in this society, a wife’s face is based on her husband’s face. Most of the time, our Chinese women chose not to talk and share in order to hide their problems and agonies, because they are lots of gossips sucking women friends surrounded them anytime ready to hurt the poor victims.

Luckily, only the ability to evoke on my brain to bring such new awakenings to get me out of blues, imagine if the evolution cells of some people’s brains are already crippled! Who on earth don’t want to get married to a husband full of financial secure, respects and dignities? But in another way round, that a look of how hopelessness and desperation could turn some women's life to a better one .... Estee Lauder and Mary Kay could create and build their own empires and rights, when their men unable giving them their needs, dignity, respect and prestige, thus such legends created. Worst are those women with their evolution cells crippled yet their wagging tongue still active!

Just for an example, Foo Chow ladies after married, their status would drop a rank immediately, as their title siew chea would turn to jiung nyu neng (adopted woman), expression in a dialect can foretell how a married woman is being demoted in such clan. So to stay as Mrs.Money, I was demoted as jobless jiung nyu neng with no gift received in all four seasons ….. There is a voice telling me to crawl on ground like a millipede, when there is something touchy and I just need to roll myself like a circle.

I told the two little moneys, “Hey, when you grow up, look out for a job or create a profession which you can earn a lot, don’t need to bride people and people don’t need to bride you, yet in your position can help and benefit a lot of people.” Really got that kind of fantastic profession in this world? May be in a robotic era in year 2222 or in other star!