Who gave them such guiltless conscience and authorities to act unethical and unreasonable?
Written by Money Tai Tai
I have heard and came across the following incidents:
A poor farmer only produced a son who eventually earned the PHDs in theological studies, the rest of the farmer’s kids hardly could even finish their secondary school studies, when it came the time of sharing inheritance, this Datuk PHDs got his lion shares, he used the inheritance to finance his kids studying in USA and eventually he settled down there, but the rest of his siblings were so angry .
An old man died, he got a billionaire son, few multimillionaires kids and also a poorest son who worked merely as a government civil servant. When the old man died, his richest sons got the lion shares of inheritance, even his reasonably rich daughters got some cash money but the poorest son got nothing.
A very rich multimillionaire died, his kids didn’t even know how much inheritance their father had, neither their dad told them anything about the inheritance “distributions” amongst them after he died, eventually the lawyer who managed the inheritance was suspected by the rich man’s kids of “swallowing lion share” on their dad’s inheritance, as the lawyer suddenly became so rich.
I concluded these faults from the above could happen were indirectly triggered by some insensitive parents significantly with many kids. Usually aggressive and smartest kids want to seek more approval from their parents no matter how successful and rich they have attained.
Worst happened when these kids visited their old folks they would love to brag their achievements: How much money they have earned, how many properties they have purchased, how many billion ringgit contracts they have won from government and what title recently they have gotten. So many things they bragged, actually they just wanted their parents to get impressed, feel proud of them and give them an approval nod. If the millionaire-sons chatted longer with old folks, things would get out handed from the low EQ old folks, “You know the worst is your useless brother who works for the government and only earns that few thousand a month! May be you should give him a hand when he retires!” What the old man never learned was that his tongue-in-cheek and low EQ actually one later days could cause his richest son to develop a sibling-bully subconsciously, one day eventually if the poorer brother goes to work for him, he has to work hardly than most of his richest brother’s employees and yet will be paid as low as the rest of his richest brother’s staff, and he won’t expect more money in his ang bow during Chinese New Year than the rest of the colleagues too!
One day the old man finally was confined on the sick bed on and off for few years, all his rich sons and daughters–in-law were hardly taking care of him near his sick bed, but everyday only the poor government servant son and the housewife daughter-in-law were taking care and staying next to him in the ICU.
Eventually the old man died, all the rest of his kids got some shares of his inheritance except this poorest son who got nothing, the richest sons would get the lion share because they thought they deserved it because they paid for all the expensive medical and health care expenses. One of the richest sons happened to be a lawyer, the old man’s will was at his disposal, because he heard his dad complaint to him that this government servant brother was the most useless brother amongst all kids, since the father disapproval of his most useless brother, he decided why he had to let his useless brother inherited some of their dad’s inheritance? He would think if his dad’s inheritance reached his hands, he could help to make more money out of that than this most useless bother.
In short, if happened there are too many kids in a family with “no family planning” parents (smart parents usually just produced enough kids within their manageable abilities, financially and time wisely) when these kids were young usually their parents were very busy and would hardly have time to see and take care of their kids.
So when these kids got older, they actually became psychologically abnormal, they still urged for old folks’ attention usually by either studied very hard to get PHDs or earned a lot of money. Then the low EQ old folks began to compare and make complaints of how useless the poorest sister or brother was, and since the old folks said nothing good about their most useless kid, do you think this most useless kid could win respect from his/her other siblings?
Actually in certain cases, some siblings thought that since the old folks expressed such disapproval of their “most nasty and useless” sibling, then they had the passport and approval to exercise their authority to run such sibling’s life and will unethically and inhumanly or even abuse such poor sibling emotionally.
Unwise old folks indirectly encouraged lurking subconscious sibling-bullies in a family with many siblings! They won’t feel any guiltiness of swallowing all other poorer and useless siblings’ inheritance from old folks because from the old folks criticizing of other “useless poorer siblings” indirectly gave them superior feeling as a saver amongst those inferior siblings, they would feel they gave most contributions and pride to the family and thus from the indirect approval from old folks would make them felt that they were entitled to inherit the most or all the inheritance of old folks.
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